domestic goddess thoughts

Ahhhh, I just smudged myself and the apartment and I am feeling lovely and freshly cleansed. Joanne Shenendoah is playing, singing women's Native American chants and a tamale is happily steaming on the stove. Lunch will also consist of a big spinach salad with tomatoes and oranges and a glass of water. Downstairs I have commenced the washing of baby clothes, which up until this day I have wanted to do but didn't, Perhaps from some deep-seated fear that there may be no point, or perhaps because I have a tendency to "save" certain activities until later. I'm not sure why I do this,, but I am aware of it and plan to change this silly pattern. What I do is this; wake up and I'm excited with some great creative idea and I'm itching to do it, but instead of just going ahead with it, I do a million other menial tasks instead and of course, never get around to doing it. WHY?? Perhaps it is a fear issue. Perhaps it is an issue concerning my ability to accept gratification in my life. I don't know. But I am going to change it.

Baby one is busy bopping around in my womb, beautifully reminding me of his presence. He will probably be a tamale lover, as I eat one for lunch every day - a new pregnant obsession. It's better than chocolate or ice cream though (-: The day is beautiful, and after the laundry is dried and folded and my lunch has been had, I would like very much to venture outside and partake of the glorious sunshine.

By the way, have I ever mentioned my great love of aprons?? It's true, I have quite a fetish, although it happens to be in a somewhat dormant state. I own a few beautiful vintage aprons, which I have lovingly packed away in a safe place in the closet, but truly I would love to hang them all over the walls, as they bring me such joy, Just the sight of them. Funny that. In a world where everyone is expected to be equal and share the roles of parents/money-makers I would have this love of aprons, which to me symbolize the beautiful dying art of women's ways,, of the biological and ancient ways of women to birth, to raise children and feed her family...
Just a thought.